Even though you planned to stay at home Halloween night, the last minute party invites never fail. I won't say it completely ruins a planned evening in the shop, but the anxiety of finding something to wear at the last minute can be overwhelming.

Naturally, you might think it'd be hilarious to bloody up a thrift shop suit and go as a Saudi Arabian journalist, but odds are someone will take offense to it, and you don't need those snowflakes in your life. Instead, toss on a shirt or jacket. Tape a leaf to your hat. Manage to find a Hawaiian shirt this time of year. Do something. Don't be the guy who's merely vaping clouds and calling himself the fog machine. It's been done.