Record Numbers of Texans Are Drinking Bleach
According to the most recent information from the North Texas Poison Center in Dallas, nearly two Texans have been admitted to the hospital for drinking bleach every day so far this month. Two people a day... Just goes to show what a Texan will do when faced with a Miller Lite shortage.
You might be wondering "Why would anybody drink bleach?" Well, we're not talking about people, we're talking about Texans. They're a unique breed of people completely different from Americans, kind of like how Australians are British, but if asked, they're Australian. Early on in the pandemic, January-ish, the science was "Alcohol kills coronavirus" and people instantly made jokes about drinking the virus away. Skip forward to March, as it really took off in America, the punchline of a lot of jokes was something along the lines of drinking bleach to fight the rona. This is a funny little quip that nobody thought would take off, but everyone forgets we're the people that used to eat Tide Pods for internet fame. Naturally, people are still drinking bleach in the Lone Star state.
Here's the quandary we've arrived at... Is it our responsibility to remind people not to drink bleach at this point? Is it right to mess with nature and the process of natural selection in this particular situation? I don't mean to come off harsh or insincere, but honestly, a grown adult that chooses to drink bleach isn't exactly the person working on the cure for cancer are they? Worst case scenario, what is the world really losing?
Full transparency... Due to the nature of this story and the employment documents I signed when I started this job, I am forced to state the following in the name of liability and lawsuit junk...
Do not drink bleach. It can be fatal. The FDA has not reviewed any study of whether drinking bleach is beneficial in the fight against Covid-19. It isn't approved for human consumption of any kind. By reading this and accepting the cookie into your browser, you accept that I am not liable for any poor decisions you choose to make with any cleaning product found under your cupboard.